Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Tag My Ass (But I Got Got)


Tag? Really? This better not be some trick or treat crap. Anyway, I got tagged by MP1 and I ain’t no party pooper (but I’m gonna kick his but if I see him in the street).

The rules of the game, apparently, are:

A). Link to the people that tagged you and post the rules on your blog...B). Share 7 random and/or weird facts about yourself...C). Tag 7 random people at the end of your post and include links to their blogs...D). Let each person know that they've been tagged by leaving a comment on their blog.

1) One day I went to work with my underwear on backwards and did not realize it until I went to pee. What kind of shit is that? I will say that it keep my package nice and secure.
2) I can’t keep a clean house to save my life. I just don’t have that gene. I try to keep my house spic and span but it is hard for me and I have no idea why. I feel like Oscar, for the Odd Couple.
3) I wish that I had kids but am glad that I don’t. Sometimes I am so irresponsible. Do you know that one time I actually misplaced my gun belt? My gun belt, people! That shit ain’t cool.
4) I hate having to put my people in jail. It is one of the most unpleasant parts of my job. That being said, I hate it when I try to cut my people a break and they are just too damn stupid to know when someone is trying to prevent from taking them to jail. Get the chip off your shoulders people, not every cop is out to get you.
5) My biggest fear in this world is being homeless and unable to take care of myself. People think I am cheap but the reality is that I save my money out of the fear of one day being out of a job and having no one else to turn to.
6) I have some of the greatest friends in the world. True friends that have been with me throughout every major event in my life. Some things that even my family were not there for. That being said, I have am so afraid to host a party, out of fear that no one will come. Self-esteem issues…Yeah, I know.
7) Okay, this is my big one, because it is recent…Saturday night, me and some other officers were out on a call were a guy was shot. When we get to the apartment, along with the ambulance, everyone gets out their vehicle and are rushing to the victim’s apartment. My dumb ass trips over a speed bump. A speed bump. WTF is up with that? Now, I was behind everyone else, so I was hoping that no one saw, especially since I feel so hard. However, one fireman did see and hear, he came over to see about me. Well, of course I had to fringe pain so as not be look too pathetic. And get this; I ended up landing on and scrapping my knuckles. What kind of uncoordinated nigger lands on his frigging knuckles when he falls? Anyway, they ended up taking the poor guy that got shot to the hospital, but not before giving me some Band-Aids for my boo-boo (I don’t care. That mess stung). The shit would have been funny, if it had happened to somebody else.

13 comments:

Omar Ramon said...

umm sir please keep track of that gun belt.
erbody has self esteem issues in one way or another...the only way folk (meaning someone who is a neat freak like me) wouldn't come to ya party is if ya place looked a mess. Sounds like somebody needs a wife...

Damn that manly pride shyt , I woulda got me a band-aid too!

Blah Blah Blah said...

The hell!!! You freakin' tagged me?!?! I did this same tag earlier this year but it was 8 things... I will endeavor to come up with some random shit....but truth be told...I tell everything...so I am not sure there is something y'all don't know. *huge sigh*

I don't even know where the hell your from but if I see you...it's ur ass...

You are hilarious. I can soo see a big ol' black guy running and then tripping. Priceless.

I live in a studio. It's just me. And yet, I seem to have like 15 glasses in my sink. The hell, why can't I just use one.

D-Place said...

Go ahead and have a party. Start off small and do a game night or something and make it potluck. If people tell you what they're going to bring then you know their be there. :-)

Sorry about the knuckles. That does hurt!

guerreiranigeriana said...

yeah...i'm coming for mp1's ass too!!..haha...

1: wtf?...lol!!
2: you need a wife...omiGod...that was soo sexist!!...
3: well, at least you recognize that...
4: whoa!!!..hold the press!!...you're a police officer?!...*looks around her room with her face frozen in shock and amazement*...holy shit!!...i sooo didn't know that...wow...okay...*taking deep breaths*..i sooo have a chip on my shoulder when it comes to police...but, you give me hope and belief that police officers are human...you're a cool ass guy...i hope i haven't offended you...just wasn't expecting that...okay...
5: that wife and kids may help here:)...you also have us here at blogville!!!...
6: amen!...three cheers for true good friends!!..
7: lol!!...funniest shit!!..wow...i needed that...i hope you are okay...:)...

ponoono said...

life is filled with speed bumps. for the criminal minded.. you ARE a speed bump.

good thing no one tripped ova u while u were on d ground.. the city woulda got sued!

One Man’s Opinion said...

I love all of you nuts, who comment on my blog. Ya'll make me smile.

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