Tuesday, April 22, 2008

Tagged! Ain't That A B*?

I was tagged by both C. Wallace and Ieisha. So, I guess I will play along. Damn it!

Here are the rules:1. Link the person who tagged you (which I don't know how to do, sorry).2. Mention the rules in your blog.3. Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours4. Tag 6 following bloggers by linking them5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger’s blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged.

Here it goes...6 idiosyncrasies about One Man and you will be sorry that you asked, trust me:

1) I have been touching myself way more than I should, lately. I would say I don't know why, but I know why. I feel so dirty.

2) In my heart of hearts I wish my sister would let me raise my little nephew. It's not that she isn't doing a great job of raising him, because he is the best behaved little monster you ever wanna meet. I just wish he was mine. Of course, he wears a brother out, so I'll be careful what I wish for. Maybe I wish that I had more hours of the day to spend with him. I hate the rear occassions that he wants to go with his uncle and I can't take him because I am just too damn tired and he needs all of my attention. He is not one of those sit down and watch television kids, like I was. And I like the fact that he wants to play, and have books read to him, but damn. LOL

3) I miss my grandmother with all my heart. She passed a way when I was still in high school, but no one, including my mom, has ever loved me as hard as my Gammy loved me. When I was in the third grade, my grandmother had her first heartache and I was so afraid she was going to die that I made a pact with God that if he took her life I wanted him to take my life as well, because that was right around the time I learned about death and didn't think I could live without my Gammy. He let her live and I took the pact further and told told God that if He ever took my Grandmother I wanted him to take me too because I didn't want to live without her. It was a blessing, because God keep his pact with me. It wasn't until I was in high school and she kelp getting hospitalized that it occurred to me that God was not taking my Gammy, because he was keeping his pact with me and he was not ready to take me. It was actually a turning point in my life and my faith. I had went to see my Grandmother, the last time she was hospitalized, and I remember how bad she looked. When I got home that night, I said the most heart felt prayer that I'd had in a long while. I cried and asked God if the only reason he was keeping my Gammy, when she was suffering, was because He didn't want to take me, that I relieved him from our pact; because I was just being selfish and I didn't want my Gammy to suffer. She died that next morning while I was at school. When my mom came to pick me up from school, and she never came to pick me up from school, she broke the news to me as we drove home. She had brought my Aunt with her, on my step-father's side of the family. I know she expected me to cry like a baby, but I didn't; because I already knew. This is when I knew without a doubt that My God was real. This is the event that I turn to when my faith is shaken. I never cried for the death of my grandmother until a week later, while I was outside picking up the trash in the yard. It was a nice balmy day and something just came over me and I just stood in the yard and openly wept. (I'm gonna move on now, because this is making me cry).
4) My Stepfather was abusive. He use to beat us, I think because we were not his kids (I know that sounds Color Purplish, but I have always thought that). He never touched us while he and my mom was dating, but as soon as he put that ring on her finger the beating started. The beating kind of stopped once my mom gave him twins. I have always been able to draw, another gift from God. When he was courting my mom and I thought he was nice, I found a full body picture of him and drew for a gift. I was in the second grade (I remember my age people because all of these thing happened when we were still living in South Dallas. We didn't move to Oakcliff until I was in the fourth grade, when my Grandmother kicked my Stepfather out for beating me for over an hour). Anyway, I drew this full body image of him, and trust me when I say that I could draw an exact likeness from a picture at that age, and gave it to him. Instead of being flattered all he did was criticize that I had drawn all of the creases and folds that his pants made in the groin area (what the fuck). He said it was inappropriate for me to have taken so much time recreating it. Can you believe that crap? I was, what, seven? I never drew another picture of him. When I was in high school and drew a picture of the family, for my mom on mothers day, I intentionally left him out. I knew it hurt his feelings, but I never got over that little comment. The painting that I post of him and my mom was the first time I had ever created another likeness of him. And you know what? That likeness of him was taken from a picture I took the day before he die. He died without me having closure, but I was glad I had swallowed my pride that day and asked to take his picture. He was in so much pain, but he got up and stood for it. I guess that was nice. I am also glad that I went to get him some grape juice that day. Normally I would not have taken time to do anything for him, but I was trying very hard to release the hate.
5) I am so afraid that I am going to suffer from Alzheimer's when I get older, if I live to get much older. Nobody ever believes me when I say this, but I am so serious. I feel the onset of it everyday. I forget simple things constantly. I often forget the name of the person I am talking to and call them every body's name but their own. There are other tale-tale signs that I will not get into, but it is a honest concern of mine.
6) I suck my thumb. I have already admitted this before. I am not ashamed of it, to be honest. I have always sucked my thumb and have come to terms with the fact that I always will. I either suck it when I am insecure or when I am at my most content. I have been known to suck it during sex, so I'm not sure which category it is falling under during that time. I have sucked it in my squad car, but never in the office. When I was working in the admissions office at one of the Community Colleges here, I remember that I needed to know something and my supervisor wouldn't tell me. She said she didn't know the answer but I thought she was lying and for some reason it made me feel really insecure. I remember sitting at my desk, which was one of the main three closest to the front counter, and sucking my thumb. I couldn't help it and to be honest with you I hadn't even realized that I'd placed it in my mouth. My supervisor was stunned and called me in her office to tell me that it was not professional for me to be sitting at my desk sucking my thumb. She was right, of course, but I told her I couldn't help it. I couldn't either. It was my body's way of providing me comfort and my thumb was instinctively going into my mouth, whether I liked it or not. That is still how it happens. I am never really aware when I pop my thumb in my mouth. It just happens.
See, I told yall this was gonna be more than you wanted to know about me. Now I can never meet any of you in real life. Don't ever tag me again!
-One Man's Opinion. Peace.


Anonymous said...

I'm glad they tagged you. Very interesting respond.

You need to get you some.

Your nephew got you wrapped around his finger.

God shows us something personally letting us know he is real. Just got to recognize it. Story about your grandma really touched me.

Ima ask you to let go of the thumb. Do you actually suck it with your remaining fingers balled up? Lol

Hadassah said...

Grannies are the greatest!

D-Place said...

I miss my Granny too. But we used to call her Gram. It's still hard to think of her being gone.

One Man’s Opinion said...

Everybody called my Grandmother, Gammy. Even her daughter. For the longest time I thought it was her name. I remember when I answered the phone and some one asked to speak to "her given name". I had no idea who the hell they were talking about. I said nobody by that name lived here. LOL. I was such a dumb kid.

JayBee said...

1. tmi
2. not with your schedule
3. i miss mine too. she was closer to me than any of the other 20+ grandkids.
4. i was abused too. takes some time to release the anger. there's something more behind his criticism. sometimes what we're not saying is the real message.
5. get a book and see what you can do to decrease the likelihood.
6. this shit has absolutely positively got to stop now. i've heard of people putting something disgusting on a child's thumb so that it tastes repulsive. if i hear any more about your overgrown azz sucking your thumb i will contact dr. phil post haste.

Don said...

lol @ ieisha tagged you. she got me too.

has ever loved me as hard as my Gammy loved me this is what we have in common. i love when you speak about your grandmother. not only can i feel your love for her, but your words give me the oppurtunity to reminisce and be thankful that my dad's mom ever walked this earth. she is the reason why i know that love isn't love until it has passed.

step-fathers suck. some do.

enjoyed the read.

Anonymous said...

1.) LOL… um…. I’m not even going to touch this one… no pun LOL

2.) I feel the same EXACT way about my nephew. OMG is he a handful, but if that little boy isn’t the light of my life I don’t know what is. Funny thing… I always talk to him about “bad touches” and “good touches” (my brother is in prison so his ex raises him alone) and to let me know if anyone ever bad touches him (particularly these trifling ass dudes she be messing with)… so his mom picked him up from school yesterday and when she went to put him into his car seat she accidentally bumped his PP… he screamed “OUCH!” and she apologized… then he tells her “Well momma that really hurt you know,” so again she apologizes, and he says “That’s okay mommy, I won’t tell Aunty on you.” that was so damn funny to me. How old is your nephew??

3.) Heavy stuff…God is real, and what an amazing story. Thanks for sharing this. This touched me in more ways than I can describe currently…

4.) Again, heavy stuff. And good for you on attempting to make amends. I have the hardest time letting go of grudges. Holding grudges grieves the holy spirit… so I definitely have to work on this. How’d he die, if you don’t mind my asking?

5.) Scary!! I don’t even want to think about this one…LOL

6.) You must discontinue this… or at least provide of with a picture of this action commencing.

Homer is My Co-pilot said...

That was an amazing story about your grandma, I remember I called like a baby at my grandma's funeral while her own son yawned like he was bored.

You need therapy for sucking your thumb, your a grown ass man lol

-eve- said...

This is seriously the best tag I've ever read :-) You're really one man! ;-)

One Man’s Opinion said...

So many haters on the Blog Spot. I gotta say, when I pass over i'm wanna be put in my casket, thumb in mouth and one pants leg rolled up to revel the ash. I leave in my will that that a picture you be taken and down up loaded for a final post.
Thumb sucking is nothing to be ashamed of, damn it. THUMB SUCKING IS THERAPY!

Gotta: We are not sure why my step father died, to be honest with you. I know he had gout really bad, but I think think anyone ever dies from that. He wasn't that old though. I think he was barely in his 60's because my mom is older than him.

VertigoVirgo said...

-If I weren’t at my desk right now pretending to do something important, I would have fallen out on the floor a long time ago, and pretended to have a seizure. lol
I sooo didn’t need to know about #1, but then again I’m a prude, all my readers know this...moving on.

-Sorry about you and your stepfather, outside of a regular old fashioned spankin', you should never lay your hands on a child, except in love... and even with a spanking my parents never used their hands, they didn’t want spankings and hugs to tie into each other.

-Thumb Sucking...hmmm...honestly never really understood the concept. I tried it once, when I was little, 'cause it seemed to be the fashionable thing for kids to do, but when I found out it didn't taste like chicken, I figured I didn't need to "look cool" and kept it movin’.

(still on Thumb Sucking subject)

-Now, during sex it’s cool to suck the finger(s) of the one your doin' it too, but if I turned and saw that mess right there (a dude suckin’ his own thumb) I probably might have to re-evaluate the situation…pretend I’m parched and send him to the kitchen to get me a glass of water, then go through his pockets and check his Drivers License to make sure it wasn't a fake, and that he wasn't really minor foolin’ me all this time!... I cain't be goin' to jail for no dude...I'm too cute for that mess. LMAO

N-E-WAY, I’m glad you shared though, maybe through this you were able to come to terms with some things.

C U L8tr

MP said...

OMG What a powerful story about you and your grandmother. That's a testimony to reality of God. I love it!

Thumb sucking!!!!!!!!!!! LMFAO! I can't believe it!

One Man’s Opinion said...

VV and everyone else. Let's back up to number one. When I say I touch myself, of course I am talking about pats on backs and self affirming hugs. My goodness, what were you people thinking.

Oh, and my thumb does taste like chicken. Thought you knew. And JB, when they tried to put hot sauce on it to keep me from sucking it, it only made it taste better. I think it's why I put hot sauce on everty thing to this day.
VV you are like my nephew, who is going to be three on June 3rd (in answer to Gotta's question). He was one of those babies who never took to the pacifier. NEVER! If it didn't have food coming from it he didn't understand why it was in him mouth. My little nephew is so special. He lucky I didn't mind walking his butt to sleep.

VertigoVirgo said...

I'm like a 3 year old!!!!! DAMN, I was hoping my writing was better than that...but okay :)

cathouse teri said...

You do NOT mess around when you share idiosyncracies! (Damn, that's a tuff word to type. And I'm not even sure it's spelt right!)


It's sweet that you want to raise your nephew. I'm sure you know, though, how much your influence means to that boy.

That Gammy story made me cry, right here at my desk! That is not nice!

I'm sorry about your abusive childhood. That made me sad. I'm glad he's dead. (Yep! I said it!)

Alzheimer's is a scary thought. Although, it's likely that the reason you are forgetting things is because you have too much on your mind, or because you need to take better care of yourself... stuff like that. I'm just sayin'

Thumbsucking... well I've certainly never thought it was a bad thing. As long as you are not trying to suck other people's thumbs! (Or do you?) And even then it's okay, as long as you don't do it in the street and scare the horses! :)

~no comment on touching yourself~
~dirty boy~

dejanae said...

oh man
sucking ur thumb during sex?
ima need u to cut that shit out now

guerreiranigeriana said...

uh...i just ran the gamut of emotions here with the post...the bit about your granny brought me to tears...but sucking your thumb during sex?!...what in the hell?!!...okay, i'm leaving it alone...

That Saddity Chic said...

I've been sucking my thumb for the past 27 years. I've tried to stop but it's a comfort thing. I only seem to do it when I'm about to go to sleep though.

Desy said...

look here black man... this thumb sucking has gotta stop. I understand it's part oral fixation and part comfort, but you need to stop... it's not good for your oral cavity in the least...

i'm sorry to hear about your grandmother... i wish i were closer to mine before she passed. I might have learned more about my momma and actually had a friendship with her... sigh

I work with Alz patients last sememster, and I've never loved a group of clients more. I taught them strategies and really worked their brains out. They actually made progress (with their memory)... I just think your issues have NOTHING to do with Alz and more to do with you havin other things on your brain besides what a person's name is....

but you better remember mine damn it...lol

RealHustla said...

It's interesting how rememberances of abuse just keep coming up in our adulthood. Guess this is why I'm so protective of my kids and still single. The fact that you suck you thum fascinates me. Do you want to stop, or do you just not care? Stop touching yourself!

Brittany said...

I love how you want to raise your nephew.
That's cute...but
what's not cute is you sucking your thumb. lol

Madam Z said...

This is the best "tag" response I have ever read! You are so open and honest. A few comments...
1. There is absolutely nothing wrong with "touching yourself!" As long as you do it in private, that is. That's what I taught my kids, when they were growing up. So go for it, One Man!
2. Your nephew is one lucky little dude.
3. Your story about your "gammy" is so sweet and touching. It's not often I read a love story that intense.
4. I hope your stepfather is burning in hell, with demons sticking pitchforks in him, 24/7.
Women should wait til their kids are grown and on their own before re-marrying. There is some innate tendency in males, of many species...not just humans, to want to destroy the offspring of other males. Listen up, ladies, and put your children first, goddamn it!!!
5. I'm pretty sure that worrying about Alzheimer's disease may make it more likely to happen. Sometimes I worry about it happening to me, but then I forget about it.
6. Go ahead and suck your thumb, honey. It feels good and it doesn't hurt anybody.

Ms Smack said...

Fantastic and insightful post about the real you and some bubbling issues on your mind.

Great read :)

Anonymous said...

Ummm, this is my first time to your blog...Good read. Deep...And I read about a grown man sucking his thumb at work, in the squad car, during sex...

I dont know why-but that is hella funny to be, but it kinda shouldnt be. Sorry for that.

I'll have to come back soon.


Mizrepresent said...

One man, lol@#1...okay, i so love your post on your grandmother, it is beyond sweet to me, and also raising your nephew, got to love it!

Ms Sula said...

Ok so do you suck your thumb after touching yourself or vice versa? and during sex, you don't use both hands? That's lazy man!

The story of your grandmother is so heartbreakingly powerful. I'm so happy you kept that memory intact.

Sorry about the abusive stepfather. Sometimes speaking about it is half the therapy.

Great tag!

One Man’s Opinion said...

I appreciate all of the comments on my Tag results. Please don't think that I still hate my Step-father, because I don't. Life is too short to hate and plus, I think it shortens your life. I just didn't get closure, but that's okay. Life goes on. He has to pay for his sins, just as we all do.

Oh, and I like sucking my thumb. I'm not ashame. It brings me joy. Don't yall want me to have joy, damn it!

lyre said...

Let me say that I am at work, at a middle school in the library surrounded by 12-14 year olds wondering what's wrong with Ms Lyre. I am bawling.
My 1st grand baby will be born in July and the 2nd in December. I pray that we share love me like your relationship with your "Gammy." I have been struggling over what I want them to call me. GeeGee, Grandmere, Nana...but now I know..."Gammy". A beautiful story. Thank you. I am so glad you were tagged.
Oh and my sister, 58 years old, retired teacher...SUCKS HER THUMB! Go for what you know...hee hee

One Man’s Opinion said...

I am glad yall were all touched by the story of my grandmother. I don't know why I shared it. I think she was just on my mind.

Ms. Sula, I know I am lazy. LOL

Lyre, I love the fact that you are gonna have you grand baby call you Gammy. That really touched my heart. It seriously did. I hope you are as precious to your grandbaby as my Gammy was me. Oh, please be mindfull of the fact that Gammy was bais towards me. Out of all her Grandchildren I was her favorite and she made no attempt to hide it. I found out it was because she never had a son and she always wanted a little boy. My mom gave her the gift of a grandson (me) and the rest is history.
Okay, I am not going to say another thing about my grandmoter, because it seriously makes me tear up anytime I think about her.

naijalines said...

Some interesting quirks there. some sad, some just keeping it real. I suck my thumb too - one on my right hand. Usually when I'm really feeling sad. Been a while since I last did it. Probably cos I've found another vice to replace it. Damn, you've been tagged already. I was going to tag u.

tweetybird said...

Touching yourself is good. Do you talk dirty while doing that too? lol

And thumb-sucking....during sex...wow...i don't even know what to say. lol

Ann(ie) said...

#1) LMAO

But, the rest....

you are just the sweetest. Your Grandma is with you daily my friend. And I love the love you have for your nephew.