Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Gov. Paterson Ain't No Punk!

David Paterson, replacement Governor for the city of New York, ain’t no punk. He’s a crazy motherf’er, but he ain’t no punk. First he admits to his post-marital affairs, now he is bringing all his shit to the light. You have heard this right? Bad boy Patterson now admits to having done, past tense, marijuana and cocaine, but it doesn’t stop there. The good governor goes on to tell how he has inhaled Freon, sprayed graffiti on subways, bet on dog fights, plotted an assassination and drove recklessly (You’d think this negro was on that game show ‘The Moment of Truth). Besides, like anybody cares about the fact that he doesn’t wear a seat belt and talks on his cell phone while he drives. I’m more concerned that his ass is driving in the first place. Ain’t he blind?!!! And how the hell you gonna assassinate anyone when yo ass can’t see?

Moving right along…all those things, except for the whore-mongering (I’m guessing), are long behind the good Governor, but he was letting it be known. I say good for him. Tell the truth and shame the devil. If you tell the truth now they can’t call you a liar later. I’m proud of him for coming forward with the truth when he was asked about his prior drug use, by a reporter. You can bet that if the reporter asked the question, it’s a good chance he already knew the answer. Anyway, what he gotta lie for anyway? He has the perfect cop out. “They told me that was a cigarette. Hell, I couldn’t see it.”

I joke, but I am hella proud of my boy, Paterson. He is a true trend setter. Did you know he became the first non-white legislative leader in New York’s history when he was elected the Democratic leader of the New York State Senate back in 2002? Then in 2004 he became the first visually impaired person to address a Democratic National Convention. Soon after, in 2006, he was elected New York’s first African-American lieutenant governor. Now, in 2008, he has been sworn in as New York’s first Black Governor.

Question: Are there any other black folk up in New York? I’m just saying.
One of the best quotes I think I have ever run across was this one given by Governor Paterson, to the New York Amsterdam News; when he said: "You don't want to be the first; you want to be the first of many." Ain’t that the truth? Although I’d settle for being the first, but not in New York; ‘cause that bastard is taking everything.

Oh, and can I just go on record as saying that I have never done an illegal drug. Never tried, experimented or had the will to. For some reason people think that everyone has partook in the experimentation of drug use, even if it was just the use of marijuana. Not true. I have never had the urge. Not that I am a saint or anything, mind you. It is just that growing up there was certain things that I knew held true for myself. When I was a in about the first grade I use to have a very compulsive nature. If I did something, like tap on the wall with one hand, I had to do it the same amount of time with the other (this was before I had ever even heard the term excessive compulsive). However, without ever been told I knew there was something wrong about this behavior. Not unlike playing with yourself, while you suck your thumb and watch Family Affair, while rubbing the silky ends of the bedspread with your feet whiles you grandma is frying chicken in the kitchen. Don’t nobody ever has to tell you it’s wrong. It’s something you just know. So, anyway, I decided at the very young age of six that I had an additive personality and that I could never do anything that could possibly become habit forming. (True story).

Anyway, how did this post become about me? DAVID PATERSON AIN’T NO PUNK!

The End

-One Man’s Opinion. Peace.


Desy said...

*securing the number 1 spot once again*

One Man’s Opinion said...

Desy, you are too funny.

Desy said...

Paterson just don't give a shyt about ANYTHING now that he's been the first to do EVERYTHING… why hide anything… he's probably thinking: I made it this far with all that history; what difference does it make now???.

LMAO@ aint he blind?!?... I was wonderin the same thing…

Question: Are there any other black folk up in New York? I’m just saying.

Apparently none have any kind of ambition… I mean really~if he could make it that damn far with his background… hell Osama could be president…ridiculousness

Digression~ I have also not done any illegal substances; but people expect that from me since supposedly I'm miss innocent…. If only they new my mental nature *slow smile*

Great post 1man~ really made me smile

James Tubman said...

you suck lol

you gotta try weed at least once

don't make it a habit though

you could be like my cousin

waiting in a closet with 2 knives in his hands lol

Curious said...

Not to knock your boy down but you forget to state that his father was New York Secretary of State Basil Paterson. Usually when you are coming from power, it's easier to get power.

But what really gets me is, "Not unlike playing with yourself, while you suck your thumb and watch Family Affair, while rubbing the silky ends of the bedspread with your feet whiles you grandma is frying chicken in the kitchen." This is a whole Dr Phil or Oprah show right there, or your next book, or both.

JayBee said...

I mean I know you don't have to see to make decisions, but I think it would be advantageous. I'm glad you were able to get some of your issues on paper. Blogging is therapy. I didn't even notice until you mentioned it how to post had become about you. Who was he conspiring to assasinate? How do you lay out a plan like that with someone who can't see? Maybe he had sight earlier in life and gradually lost it.

Homer is My Co-pilot said...

What kind of graffiti was he spraying? is that why I can't read it? because blind people spray it? And the whole thing about playing with your self..... you need more therapy than a blog brother, lmao

One Man’s Opinion said...

Nope, Jaybee, he was born legally bline. My source said he had plotted the assasination of Kennedy. Who knows, maybe they were kidding, but it was in quotes.

Desy is my girl. Twin, have you been checking her out?

Tubman, I scared of you cousin. Very scared.

Homer, my boy Paterson was hell bent on not being seen as handicap. And don't judge me, damn it! Till this very day the smell of chicken frying gets me hot. LOL>

Uzezi said...

let everyone know, we are all sinners, that way we can repair the man. Im loving him.

Son of a Bishop said...

Evidently Governor Patterson has an addictive personality just like you... he was clearly addicted to crime and now addicted to telling the truth about his past. :)
"His definitely not a punk."

Now One Man's Opinion, I feel very sorry for you, if you attend a very small Baptist or Pentecostal church where they fry chicken in the basement for the Sunday after service dinner. LOL!

guerreiranigeriana said...

damn uzezi for making me have a conscious in posting this comment...i was going to royally roast...but as she so nicely pointed out...we all are sinners and he who is without sin can cast the first stone...*a moment of silence for the stone casting...want to make sure everyone can hear the stones being cast...oh, no stones...ok*..., uh, congrats to him, i guess...

dejanae said...

u came with the funny today

i mean. its best to put ur stuff ut there than have some journalist dig that shit up and put you on blast later on

i aint did shit either
not even a bootleg puff on a cigarette
im good
aint even curious

and that whole playing with urself line.....
whatnahell u got goin on in that brain of urs?

One Man’s Opinion said...

yall are all so funny. Of course I am sure you all know I was kidding about the playing with myself thing. Of course I am a vigin. However, since it got you good people's attention. I think Friday's post will be about the discovery of masturbation.

Mizrepresent said...

lol, you are crazy! But cute! "while grandma's frying chicken"...OMG what a visual.

MP said...

I don't really care what he has done but... but he needs to shut up now. He aint president and we aren't catholic priests all this confession crap needs to stop. Ex-crackheads are looked at just a favorably as crackheads. He needs to stop talking and just do his job. He has added to many adjectives to this title. First Black, ___, ___, ___, mayor of NY!

Bygbaby said...

Oh hell no. That nigga is GANGSTA!!! Is his ass really driving though, that sounds scary as hell. All the other site is cool, but his ass should not be behind the wheel & who in the fuck was he going to assassinate.

Nall you made this shit up!!!