Two Movies in two days.
This week, instead of staying home and doing jack like I normally do, I decided to go to the movies. We all know that summer is supposedly the time for all the blockbuster hits. Well, I’ll be the job of that.
Yesterday, Tuesday, I hung out with my friend-let’s call her Princess. Princess texted me last week and told me she wanted to go see either Hancock or Wanted. I told her I could go and see Wanted, but I had already promised a Hancock viewing with someone else. Wanted it was. At this point we decided we would meet at 3pm. How come we didn’t end up getting to the movies until six something.
I’ll tell you why, Princess is as much of a procrastinator as me. She had to go to the gym. Then she didn’t know if she was going to be needed at her soft ball game. Our plans changed quit a bit, but not on my side. I don’t plan my life. As long as I am at home with a working television set, I’m good.
Princess is like the female version of myself. As a matter of fact Princess is me if I allowed myself to be as much of a recluse as my mind and body would like me to be. Princess is the friend outside of the circle of friends. Everyone knows her and thanks that she is cool, but she just does not do groups well. She is much better one on one. Which I can totally relate to. However I know what made me the way I am. I had an abusive step-father. I have no idea what fucked Princess social skills up.
Anyway, we go to see Wanted. Best movie ever. I love it. It had action. It had comedy. It had sexy Angelina. It had some white guy without his shirt on. It had special effects. It had mass destruction. It had knives, bullets, guns, cars and blood. It had a fucked up twist. It even had a moral. Only thing it didn’t have was nudity, but you don’t miss it.
After the movie we went to Starbuck so Princess could have one of their expensive ass frozen coffees. I hate Starbucks. Their coffee literally gives me diarrhea. It ain’t cute. But I go so me and Princess can talk. We don’t hang out that often, but now that she is off for summer vacation I told her we should go to the movies once a week.
Yes, Princess is a teacher. She began her career as a teacher around the same time I began mines as a cop. Two of the most under appreciated, under paid jobs you can have, right? Still, I give teachers all the props in the world. They have to put up with BS that I wouldn’t stand for.
Anyway, while we are hanging out I find out that my good friend Princess is a Cougar. Yall know what a Cougar is, right? An older woman who goes after young men. At least I think that is the definition. Don’t get me wrong, Princess is only in here early thirties, but she has the hots for a young man ten years older, so I told her that she was a Cougar. I also told her that I was going to tell the blogging community to be on the look out for her hot ass. LOL. (No, I did not give her the blog address. I learned from that mistake).
Today, Wednesday, my mom, aunt Shelly and I went to see the movie Hancock. I still had promised to see this movie with a homeboy of mines, but decide that it was much more important to take my mom out to see a movie and this was the only one she wanted to see that I had not already see. I think I will take her to see Iron Man or something next week. I have already seen it, but she sounded like she really wanted to see that too.
Anyway, yall know I love my mom to death. I would honestly give up my life on this world if it meant that she would be able to walk again. Anyway, going anywhere with my mom can be a chore. And it is not for the reasons that you think it is. It is not the fact that she is rarely ready, because this has more to do with my little brother and sister than her. It is not the fact that she has to use the restroom before we leave the house. That is for the best, because it is hard for me to pick which bathroom I am going to accompany her into; normally the ladies room (not to embarrassing). It isn’t even the fact that sometimes she has a bowel movement and I end up have to wipe her hinney for her. It is not the most comfortable thing I ever had to do, but it has to be done. Nope, it is because she is so damn bossy and thinks that everything has to be done right then and there, even though she has just given you instructions to do five freaking things. It is so annoying. If I could break her of this habit everything else would be gravy.
Anyway, we get to the movies. Aunt Shelly meets us there. I buy the tickets for all. The young lady says that the movie is not sold out but it is packed. I explain that my mom is handicap and ask if the movie is too packed if I could exchange the tickets for a different showing. She says sure. I explain this to the ticket taker. She sends us back. I go take a look inside the theater to see if there is any space in the back. I can see that there are people in the back row but it is to dark to really make anything out. What the hell. I run back to my car, grab my flashlight and spot light the hell out of folks. (it is hard to yell at a man with a woman in a wheel chair).
I wheel my mom into the back, make her comfortable and then me and Aunt Shelly find us a seat. The movie was great. No moral at the end, which I enjoy. Don’t preach to me, damn it. If I wanted to learn, I’d read a book. I also liked the fact that it was a hero movie with out the typical super villain (that’s all I’m saying). I am not a big Will Smith fan, but he has made some good choices in the parts he plays (I still don’t see him as Obama though). This movie has lots of laugh, profanity, child abuse, violence, truth, justice and the American way. You even get to see Will Smith’s naked ass! (They didn’t even show a boob on Angelina).
Of the two movies I would say I enjoyed Wanted more, even though the whole audience clapped at the end of Hancock. Picture this. And Auditorium full of black folks, clapping at the end of a movie. How white is that? Seriously. LOL. Anyway, both movies are worth watching. Just remember this. When you think Hancock is over, it is not. They role credits, stop and show another small scene. It is funny. Everyone in the theater was headed out and stop in the mid stride to see the actual end of the movie. Don’t let this happen to you.
I don’t know why people leave movie at the so call end anymore anyway. Don’t we know by now that the directors always sneak in a little some in-between the credits?
-One Man’s Opinion. Peace.
Next week I am going to see The Butt, The Blue Jeans and the Handjob.